Coronavirus in Context: Building Resilience in Children: How Parents Can Turn a Stressful Situation into an … – WebMD

You're watching Coronavirus in Context. I'm Dr. John Whyte, Chief Medical Officer at WebMD. Today we're going to talk about the impact of COVID-19 on kids. And my guest is Dr. Burke Harris. She's a pediatrician and surgeon general of the state of California. Dr. Burke Harris, thanks for joining me.

NADINE BURKE HARRIS

JOHN WHYTE

NADINE BURKE HARRIS

And so some of the ways that, um, kids can manifest stress, um, are really, you know, changes in their sleeping patterns. For little kids, changes in their toileting habits. So, you know, a kid who's been potty trained, they can have a little bit of that regression and, uh, you know, go back to wetting or something along those lines.

And then as kids get older, we see, you know, some kids have, uh, they don't necessarily say that, oh, you know, I'm feeling stressed. They may have tummy aches. They may have headaches. And for older kids like teenagers, we-- they may be more irritable or they could even be more withdrawn.

JOHN WHYTE

NADINE BURKE HARRIS

JOHN WHYTE

NADINE BURKE HARRIS

I think for, uh, some kids, asking how are they keeping in touch with their friends, how is so-and-so doing, that is, um, particularly for teenagers who stay in touch with their friends either via social media or through, um, you know, or through text or other technology.

Asking some of these rand-- you know, roundabout questions can help us understand, uh, whether or not our-- our kids are staying connected to their social networks. I think for littler kids, it's-- you can just, you know, really straightforwardly ask if they have any concerns.

Ask-- you know, what have they heard about the coronavirus and if they have any worries. And give them an opportunity to share, in their own language, what they've heard, you know, what they're nervous or scared about, and then correct any misperceptions that may be going on.

JOHN WHYTE

NADINE BURKE HARRIS

So-- so I think that, uh, you know, although of course we want to put limits on kids' screen time. We, at the same time, have to recognize that, you know, it's OK for-- for us to give ourselves a break and give our kids a little bit of a break as well.

JOHN WHYTE

NADINE BURKE HARRIS

Getting out and doing some exercise every day, really important. We make sure that the kids get on their bikes and, you know, go around the-- go around the park and have an opportunity to get some of that energy out. Um, also, even though kids are not going to school every day, I think keeping those regular routines is really important. So going to bed at the same time each night, waking up at the same time each morning, and having some regular routines. Having the kids have an opportunity to-- to share in setting those routines I think is really important. Um, and we have a lot of fun with, you know, nutrition. There's a lot more cooking that goes on during the pandemic time, uh, which is a lot of fun.

But we make sure that the kids are getting healthy meals, because it's very easy for all of us to be, you know, craving some of those high sugar, high fat foods. And that's not just because, you know, we're at home. It's because when we feel stressed, stress hormones like cortisol actually cause our bodies to crave high sugar, high fat foods. And so having good nutrition is actually really important to helping to regulate the stress response.

JOHN WHYTE

NADINE BURKE HARRIS

But the other thing that's also really important that we often forget as parents and caregivers is that one of the most important things for children's well-being is our own well-being, right? In scary situations, what kids do is they instinctively look at their parents and caregivers.

And if we're freaking out, that gives them the signal that they-- that they should be freaking out. And so our ability to put our own oxygen mask on and do that self care so that we can be well regulated actually helps our kids be able to regulate themselves.

JOHN WHYTE

NADINE BURKE HARRIS

The tolerable stress response where the body is affected by it, but through the buffering effect of caring relationships, the body returns to that natural biological balance. And there's something that's even called a positive stress responses, which is, you know, a little bit of stress that's self-limited can actually lead to further growth and development.

And so the thing that I'm really optimistic about is that with that safe and nurturing relationships and with that buffering care, I think that there's an opportunity to keep the stress into that positive or tolerable range and out of the toxic range.

And I think there's a lot of, um, growth and connection, a deepening of a sense of empathy, and a-- a level of development that can happen right now that, uh, I think ultimately has an-- an opportunity to be a time of growth.

JOHN WHYTE

NADINE BURKE HARRIS

JOHN WHYTE

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JOHN WHYTE

NADINE BURKE HARRIS

JOHN WHYTE

NADINE BURKE HARRIS

And so some of the ways that, um, kids can manifest stress, um, are really, you know, changes in their sleeping patterns. For little kids, changes in their toileting habits. So, you know, a kid who's been potty trained, they can have a little bit of that regression and, uh, you know, go back to wetting or something along those lines.

And then as kids get older, we see, you know, some kids have, uh, they don't necessarily say that, oh, you know, I'm feeling stressed. They may have tummy aches. They may have headaches. And for older kids like teenagers, we-- they may be more irritable or they could even be more withdrawn.

JOHN WHYTE

NADINE BURKE HARRIS

JOHN WHYTE

NADINE BURKE HARRIS

I think for, uh, some kids, asking how are they keeping in touch with their friends, how is so-and-so doing, that is, um, particularly for teenagers who stay in touch with their friends either via social media or through, um, you know, or through text or other technology.

Asking some of these rand-- you know, roundabout questions can help us understand, uh, whether or not our-- our kids are staying connected to their social networks. I think for littler kids, it's-- you can just, you know, really straightforwardly ask if they have any concerns.

Ask-- you know, what have they heard about the coronavirus and if they have any worries. And give them an opportunity to share, in their own language, what they've heard, you know, what they're nervous or scared about, and then correct any misperceptions that may be going on.

JOHN WHYTE

NADINE BURKE HARRIS

So-- so I think that, uh, you know, although of course we want to put limits on kids' screen time. We, at the same time, have to recognize that, you know, it's OK for-- for us to give ourselves a break and give our kids a little bit of a break as well.

JOHN WHYTE

NADINE BURKE HARRIS

Getting out and doing some exercise every day, really important. We make sure that the kids get on their bikes and, you know, go around the-- go around the park and have an opportunity to get some of that energy out. Um, also, even though kids are not going to school every day, I think keeping those regular routines is really important. So going to bed at the same time each night, waking up at the same time each morning, and having some regular routines. Having the kids have an opportunity to-- to share in setting those routines I think is really important. Um, and we have a lot of fun with, you know, nutrition. There's a lot more cooking that goes on during the pandemic time, uh, which is a lot of fun.

But we make sure that the kids are getting healthy meals, because it's very easy for all of us to be, you know, craving some of those high sugar, high fat foods. And that's not just because, you know, we're at home. It's because when we feel stressed, stress hormones like cortisol actually cause our bodies to crave high sugar, high fat foods. And so having good nutrition is actually really important to helping to regulate the stress response.

JOHN WHYTE

NADINE BURKE HARRIS

But the other thing that's also really important that we often forget as parents and caregivers is that one of the most important things for children's well-being is our own well-being, right? In scary situations, what kids do is they instinctively look at their parents and caregivers.

And if we're freaking out, that gives them the signal that they-- that they should be freaking out. And so our ability to put our own oxygen mask on and do that self care so that we can be well regulated actually helps our kids be able to regulate themselves.

JOHN WHYTE

NADINE BURKE HARRIS

The tolerable stress response where the body is affected by it, but through the buffering effect of caring relationships, the body returns to that natural biological balance. And there's something that's even called a positive stress responses, which is, you know, a little bit of stress that's self-limited can actually lead to further growth and development.

And so the thing that I'm really optimistic about is that with that safe and nurturing relationships and with that buffering care, I think that there's an opportunity to keep the stress into that positive or tolerable range and out of the toxic range.

And I think there's a lot of, um, growth and connection, a deepening of a sense of empathy, and a-- a level of development that can happen right now that, uh, I think ultimately has an-- an opportunity to be a time of growth.

JOHN WHYTE

NADINE BURKE HARRIS

JOHN WHYTE

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Coronavirus in Context: Building Resilience in Children: How Parents Can Turn a Stressful Situation into an ... - WebMD